A Minister for Propaganda Elf writes: “Things have been going rather swimmingly for our humble offering
THE BIG O of late, people. The good folk at Harcourt recently sent through the art-work for the cover of
the forthcoming US edition, with which the Grand Viz was well pleased, mainly because it suggested that the designer boffin responsible had paid close attention to the text, to the point where the ever-radiant
Maxine Clarke was moved to suggest that the cover itself might represent something of a plot spoiler. That was swiftly followed by the news that THE BIG O has been
short-listed for the Bristol Crime Fest ‘Last Laugh’ award, a huge boost to the GV’s scheme for world domination, not least because the vagaries of alphabeticisation mean that the moniker ‘Burke, Declan’ heads the short-list (literally, if not actually). Hot on the heels of that little nugget of joy came the news that
the Book Witch had a quick gander at THE BIG O’s sequel, currently labouring under the unlikely title of THE BLUE ORANGE, and professed herself hugely impressed with GV’s ability to apply the spell-check function. Three cheers, two stools and a resounding huzzah, said we, as we limbered up to breast-stroke through the vat of our Patented Elf-Wonking Juice™. But lo! There’s more!
For yea, it came to pass that the eagle-eyed
John McFetridge dropped us a line to point up the similarities between our cover and that of an edition of
KILLSHOT by some American tyro called Ellroy Leonard, or Elmore Lennox, or summat akin. Well, you could’ve knocked us down with a feather made of microscopic sledgehammers. Still, they do say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, do they not? And, given that THE BIG O is a fourth-rate rip-off of Mr Lennox / Leonard’s style, it makes perfect sense that the Harcourt designer boffins should produce a first-rate homage to one of Mr Lennox / Leonard’s covers. Right, that’s us off for a couple of lengths in the vat of Patented Elf-Wonking Juice™. Be beautiful, people. Peace, out.”
A Minister for Propaganda Elf writes: “Things have been going rather swimmingly for our humble offering THE BIG O of late, people. The good folk at Harcourt recently sent through the art-work for the cover of the forthcoming US edition, with which the Grand Viz was well pleased, mainly because it suggested that the designer boffin responsible had paid close attention to the text, to the point where the ever-radiant Maxine Clarke was moved to suggest that the cover itself might represent something of a plot spoiler. That was swiftly followed by the news that THE BIG O has been short-listed for the Bristol Crime Fest ‘Last Laugh’ award, a huge boost to the GV’s scheme for world domination, not least because the vagaries of alphabeticisation mean that the moniker ‘Burke, Declan’ heads the short-list (literally, if not actually). Hot on the heels of that little nugget of joy came the news that the Book Witch had a quick gander at THE BIG O’s sequel, currently labouring under the unlikely title of THE BLUE ORANGE, and professed herself hugely impressed with GV’s ability to apply the spell-check function. Three cheers, two stools and a resounding huzzah, said we, as we limbered up to breast-stroke through the vat of our Patented Elf-Wonking Juice™. But lo! There’s more! 
For yea, it came to pass that the eagle-eyed John McFetridge dropped us a line to point up the similarities between our cover and that of an edition of KILLSHOT by some American tyro called Ellroy Leonard, or Elmore Lennox, or summat akin. Well, you could’ve knocked us down with a feather made of microscopic sledgehammers. Still, they do say imitation is the most sincere form of flattery, do they not? And, given that THE BIG O is a fourth-rate rip-off of Mr Lennox / Leonard’s style, it makes perfect sense that the Harcourt designer boffins should produce a first-rate homage to one of Mr Lennox / Leonard’s covers. Right, that’s us off for a couple of lengths in the vat of Patented Elf-Wonking Juice™. Be beautiful, people. Peace, out.”
Erm, sorry Peter. At the risk of further spoiling it for you, KILLSHOT may also feature a man holding said gun, possibly in a threatening fashion. Cheers, Dec
ReplyDeleteGV,where do you find your elves? All of the ones I have employed talk like they just escaped from a Tolkien book. I want some that say "Peace out" like yours do. :(
ReplyDeleteBy the way, I think your cover is waaaaay cooler. It incorporates the graphic much better than just slapping it onto a cover.
You used a spell checker?
ReplyDeleteOh, I get it. Irony?
Josh - What you gotta do is, breed out the imperfections. You want to mate an Oompa-Loompa with a Hobbit, then select for the recessive midgetness gene. Et voila, CAP elves. Ms Witch? A man walks into a bar. He says, 'Oooof!' It was an irony bar, see ... Cheers, Dec
ReplyDeleteDagnabbit. Josh said what I was going to say. I mean about the cover, not the elves. I know nothing of elves. Or pixies, for that matter.
ReplyDeleteThe U.S. cover is WAY better looking than the original publication. I can't wait to get one!
AND it's much more clever and relevant as the end of the barrel is part of the title. It's what Elmore Leonard WISHES his could be. But isn't. And so on, and so forth.
ReplyDelete