“Ya Wanna Do It Here Or Down The Station, Punk?”: Bill Crider

Yep, it’s rubber-hose time, folks: a rapid-fire Q&A for those shifty-looking usual suspects ...

What crime novel would you most like to have written?
I could make you a very long list, but the two at the top every time would be THE BIG SLEEP and THE MALTESE FALCON. They’d just switch places every now and then.

What fictional character would you most like to have been?
Again, a very long list. Odysseus for the adventures and the cleverness, Spenser for the self-assurance, Superman for the . . . what the heck, let’s go with Superman.

Who do you read for guilty pleasures?
I never feel guilty about anything I read. I have enough other problems with guilt as it is, though sometimes I do feel a little guilty about rereading old books when I could be reading new ones.

Most satisfying writing moment?
When something clicks and I know that what I’m writing doesn’t entirely suck.

The best Irish crime novel is …?
I’m partial to Ken Bruen’s work, so today THE GUARDS would be my pick.

What Irish crime novel would make a great movie?
I think THE BIG O would make a terrific movie, don’t you? It’s by some guy named Burke.

Worst / best thing about being a writer?
There are plenty of good things. Getting paid is one that I enjoy. Finishing a book and liking what you’ve done is another. Worst thing? Having to do the actual work. Why can’t the book just spring from my brain like Athena from the forehead of Zeus? Maybe that would be too painful, but so is writing a book.

The pitch for your next book is …?
Wild hogs. Murder. More wild hogs.

Who are you reading right now?
Just finished reading an oldie, BACKFIRE, by Dan J. Marlowe. Not rereading, so no guilt involved.

God appears and says you can only write OR read. Which would it be?
I’d have to say “read.” Writing is good, but reading is better. And a lot easier.

The three best words to describe your own writing are …?
You should probably be asking my readers. But I’ll go with smooth, clear, and amusing. Well, it amuses me, anyway.

Bill Crider’s MURDER IN THE AIR is published by Minotaur Books. Bill Crider is the editor of DAMN NEAR DEAD 2, a collection of ‘geezer noir’ short stories published by Busted Flush Press.